9/6/2008

Given a choice I buy Canadian
Capster
The Green Shift:

"It's like a man who has a horse and feeds hay to the horse and stands under the back end of the horse hoping to get the same amount of hay out that he put in, and it just doesn't happen. So revenue neutral, in terms of Ottawa, is a myth." - Guelph NDP candidate Tom King..
Here is a primer for those of you who still don't understand how global warming works:

* The dinosaurs came, but they got too big and fat, so they all died and they turned into oil.
* We drilled for oil, and used most of it to spray on ducks, and the rest we turned into carbon dioxide.
* Carbon dioxide is a hot gas, and it's making the Sun hotter, which is making the Earth hotter, which makes polar bears sweat, and that's a bad thing.
* To make the Earth cooler and make polar bears happy, Canadians will pay money to Stephane Dion, who will give all of it back.
* The exchange of money will cool the Earth (ok, this part is a bit vague).
* Farmers are worried that they won't get enough back after all of it is given back (clearly they are confused, because everyone is supposed to get all their money back, a process that results in global cooling in a way that is not entirely understood by non-Liberals).
* Liberals who are worried that farmers won't vote for them are complaining loudly, which is generating even more hot air (which warms the Sun and makes polar bears sweat even more, and that's a bad thing).
* Stephane Dion is going to change the plan by making the carbon tax even stronger, making farmers happy so that they stop bothering Liberals.
* This results in less hot air and comfortable polar bears.
* The happiness of farmers who might vote Liberal will cool the Earth (ok, this part is a bit vague too).

Remember, if you don't believe this science, David Suzuki is going to throw you in jail.

How they spend your money

  • Manitoba’s Rockwood Penitentiary Institution ran a pilot project to open tattoo parlors in jails for $700,000 … Ouch!

  • The City of Toronto spent $853,000 on emergency shelter beds that went unused in 2004 … Ouch!
  • The Canadian Council for the Arts (Federal and Provincial) has given Cesar Saez $64,800 for his Big Banana in Space Project over Texas … Ouch!

  • A recent report by Informa Economics has concluded that last year the Canadian Wheat Board – a legalized monopoly - cost Canadian farmers up to $3 Billion … Ouch!
  • The Social Studies and Humanities research Council gave a $37,082 grant for the study of “Hunters, bears, masculinity and the politics of identity in Ontario and France”
  • Public Employee Tom Parkinson was making $1,500,000 a year as CEO of Hydro One when it was discovered that he used the company helicopter to visit his private cottage. He voluntarily resigned and received a $3,000,000 severance package.
  • Lucie McClung spent $142,000 traveling to Hong Kong, New Zealand, Brazil, Barbados and Europe as the correctional services chief. She also expensed her $500 annual fee and $9,000 of dining bills from the Rideau Club.

Are you pissed off yet?

Dog for Sale

  • Free to good home.
  • Excellent guard dog.
  • Owner cannot afford to feed him anymore, as there are no more thieves, murderers, or molesters left in the neighborhood for him to eat.
  • Most of them knew him as 'Holy Shit.'
h/t to Brian

Almost nine years have passed since I set up capreolonline.com; 443 issues have been published.
Since January 2001, the site experienced 11,908,240 hits. (Look at the map below to see where the viewers are.)

This would have not been possible without the help of regular contributers such as Cass, Hannah, Jessica, Gammi, Fat Louis, Alex Nepitt, Frank Madigan, and the many others who occasionally contributed.

Thanks must also go those of you who have sent in the $36 yearly subscription fee; you helped keep the site alive.

Along the way, three computers, three monitors, two printer/scanners and oodles of software, two servers, two cameras, a drawer full of CDs and DVDs for backup, countless hours of writing/typing/scanning, and hundreds of photographs and dozens of slideshows have made the site possible and, hopefully informative and interesting.

Has it been fun? Certainly most of the times.
Regrets? The failure to gather local news and events. Unless I am informed I can't publish them.

So, if you know of something happening, perhaps a birthday, and anniverary, a retirement, a yard sale, a recent photo or one from the past, or anything else you would like to share with your fellow Capreolites send me an email or call me at 665-6050.
If you have an idea for a new site feature or a column let me know.

BTW, how about those Google Ads? Every time you click on one I get a few cents from Google. If you find one interesting, click on it.